Can You Eat What You Want & Stay Sexy Skinny?

Yes, if you use Habituation,
Desensitization and Delayed Gratification Techniques.

 
 
Almost everyone has a moment of reckoning about their weight gain—a moment so packed with meaning that it bursts through the damn of denial. Mine came at a department store when I was 28 and unconsciously reached for a size 36 waist pants. Wasn’t I a 34 for the last six months? And a 32 the year before?

I could no longer pretend the dry cleaners were using some kind of chemical that shrank my pants. Skinny all my life I had come to an unwanted realization: I was getting fat. And that if I didn’t change my direction I was going to end up where I was headed.
[Read more…] about How To Lose Weight Without Dieting

Guest Post by Eileen Dover for Grabhim.net

We’ve all seen the ads, even in the “Pre-Grindr/Scruff” days when a dude would put an ad in the back of a magazine or a recording on a phone line with his stats, size, girth, and phone number, waiting for someone to call, someone hot, someone young, someone sexy, someone……..Straight acting, Straight appearing, certainly not fat or femmie and if they’ve ever worn a dress please, don’t waste your time.

Even men who themselves, are not jacked and masculine reject men who don’t live up to their preconceived notions of a man that both mainstream and gay media perpetuate. It strikes me hilarious when an average looking, heavy set, Madonna loving, Golden Girls watching, cocktail party throwing, gay guy has so much to say about the level of tolerable femininity or desired amount of masculinity a potential suitor is allowed to portray… For shame!
[Read more…] about You Do WHAT?!

A Reader Asks What To Do When Guys Ask About The Size Of His Prize

QUESTION:

I was on a hookup app when I hit on a size queen.  Please read my transcript—I’ve got some questions!

Me: Dude, you are SO my type.  Let’s hook up.

Uinmymouth.cum: How big?

Me: Come over and measure it.

Uinmymouth: LOL.

Me: Come on, man, we live in the same neighborhood.  Let’s hook up.

Uinmymouth: Cool, but how big are you?

Me: Never measured myself.

Uinmymouth: Well, you must have some idea.

Me: Why are you asking me something I could so easily lie about?  I could tell you 9 inches and how would you know until you unzipped my pants?

Uinmymouth: You’re right and if you’re not WELL above average I would leave—so don’t waste your time if you’re small or average.

Me: Wow.  So, even though you think I’m hot and even if there’s great chemistry when we meet you’re out the door if I unzip and turn out to be average?  Or even bigger than average but not WELL above average?

Uinmymouth: Yep.  Might as well be honest—that’s why I asked.

Me: It’s honest; I’ll give you that.

Uinmymouth: ;>)

Me: And you, pray tell, must have at least 8 inches, right?  Otherwise, you’re going to be very embarrassed when I unzip you.

Uinmymouth: Yes, it’s honest.  And I’m bigger than 8 inches, btw.

Me: Well, if that’s true I guess you’re putting your money where your mouth is.

Uinmymouth: Yes, but it doesn’t really matter how big I am.  I’m only interested in servicing another man’s cock.

Me: Well, like I said, I’ve never measured myself.  I mean I know I’m bigger than most of the guys I sleep with but if you’re looking for a monster cock I’m not your man.

Uinmymouth: Later, man.

Me: ?

Uinmymouth: I want dick, not drama.

 So here’s my question:  Do you think I was wrong for not telling him how big my dick is?  What should I do the next time it happens?

—  Victorian Whore

Dear Whore:

I don’t think anything can be more humiliating than typing out your dimensions, sending them out and hoping some stranger on the other end deems you worthy enough to meet.

HOWEVER.

You were on a hookup app.  It and other apps like it administer dick the way an E.R. doctor administers painkillers—quickly, so you’ll shut the fuck up.

While I share your values and principles, you might want to be a little more flexible when you’re chatting on apps that may as well be called Dick Central.

So, what can you do if someone’s looking for Frankencock and keeps asking if that access of evil in your pants is measured in inches or feet?

1)        Answer them honestly. Don’t make a big deal out of it.   If you’re big don’t brag over it; if you’re not don’t dwell on it.

2)        Don’t answer them. Ask them what they’re looking for.  Five, six, seven, eight inches?  And if they say something in your range, say, “I can help.”  If it’s not, then say, “Sorry, out of your range by half an inch.”

3)        Quit taking this so personally. Size queens are like leather queens or fetishists—they’ve eroticized an object.  Would you be upset if a leather man asked, “Are you into handcuffs and getting gang-raped by overweight geezers dressed in Tele-tubby outfits?”   Of course not.  You’d just type out, “No, but Ted Cruz is.  Here’s his email address.”

4)    Answer with a question. Like, “How big is your hole?” Keep repeating it until they stop asking about your size.

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Featured in this blog: The one game-changing sex tip that’ll help you bottom without pain.

 
Would you rather date a guy with a big dick or a great personality? Most guys know the socially approved answer is “great personality.” But is that how they show up in life? When we conducted a 4,000 person study on how gay men behave on dating apps we were surprised to learn that 59% admitted to asking other guys about the size of their penis while 83% actually sent dic pics.

That’s not exactly a win for the “great personality” column.

Still, that’s probably not a fair indication of what gay men prefer given that the apps are engorged with shirtless pics, which heightens sexual not romantic desire. To get at the real answer the question has to make a distinction between dating and sexing. The truth is most of us want it all–a big unit WITH a great personality but since few men have both the question remains: If you had to choose between what’s in his pants and what’s in his heart what would your answer be?

Keep coming back to this page to see how the votes populate.

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Featured in this blog: The one game-changing sex tip that’ll help you bottom without pain.

 
Would you rather date a guy with a big dick or a great personality? Most guys know the socially approved answer is “great personality.” But is that how they show up in life? When we conducted a 4,000 person study on how gay men behave on dating apps we were surprised to learn that 59% admitted to asking other guys about the size of their penis while 83% actually sent dic pics.

That’s not exactly a win for the “great personality” column.

Still, that’s probably not a fair indication of what gay men prefer given that the apps are engorged with shirtless pics, which heightens sexual not romantic desire. To get at the real answer the question has to make a distinction between dating and sexing. The truth is most of us want it all–a big unit WITH a great personality but since few men have both the question remains: If you had to choose between what’s in his pants and what’s in his heart what would your answer be?

Keep coming back to this page to see how the votes populate.

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7 Wildly Clever Ways of Putting His Dialing Finger To Work.

In the ideal world Mr. Man has the confidence to ask for your number, but too many don’t.  So sometimes a guy’s gotta do what a guy’s gotta do and sometimes a guy has to give him his number and make him think he asked for it.

You can do it in funny, clever ways.  The idea is to chase him until he catches you.  Here are some great examples that amp up the fun with zero awkwardness:

 
 
 
 
[Read more…] about How To Give Him Your Phone Number And Make Him Think He Asked For It.

Top 10 Gay Dating & Hookup Apps Ranked by Customer Satisfaction Reviews

Ever wonder if your experience with the gay dating and hookup apps  matches up with other people’s experiences? Sure, you can compare notes with friends but why go with anecdote when you can look at hard data? To that end we compiled hundreds of thousands of gay dating and hookup app reviews from the Android and IOS platforms, merged them  and came up with a weighted average to get the clearest picture yet of which app gay men like best.

 

Note that there is actually a tie for the number one spot on our list, yet we designated a rank because of the “law of large numbers,” which states that larger numbers equate to more stable data.  In our case, that means the more reviews an app has, the more believable the rating.  So, Jack’d’s 4.1 rating is way more believable than Growlr’s 4.1 rating because it has triple the number of reviews.

 

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There are three aspects to gay dating apps that can make the experience feel like a massive cyber circle jerk. 1) You see a lot of the same guys on all the different platforms. 2) Every geosocial app is loaded with bitchy profiles where guys list all the things they’re not looking for without a word about what they desire. 3) There is an endless rabbit hole of headless, bare torsos.

 

With some of these apps you can almost smell the blow job breath through your smartphone. Other apps try to clean it up a bit so they can pass as a gay dating app not just a hook-up bathhouse. Either way, homo hook-up apps are the gay background music of our time, and here are six of the standout tracks:

Gay Dating App #1: Gay.com

Whoa – talk about a blast from the past! Upon discovering that the venerable Gay.com launched a new mobile dating/hook-up app in September, I couldn’t help but think of those recent commercials urging folks to check out the revamped MySpace. The app is billed as an extension of the computer version of “the world’s original and most recognized LGBT social networking site,” which may be true, but has anyone logged onto Gay.com via a computer in the last five years?

To my delightful surprise, I was thoroughly impressed by what I saw once I registered. Maybe it was the soft blue background or that (like Grindr) the thumbnails are larger than on most apps, but there was something refreshing about returning to the Gay.com franchise.

The app is still fresh enough to have that new condom smell (no offense intended to the scent of used rubbers). Of course you come across some profiles that you see active on EVERY site 24/7 (with the SAME photo that’s at least eight years old), but I also came across guys who had me wondering where they’ve been hiding. There were a surprising number of teenagers and guys in their early 20s on what I considered a retro platform, and a diversity of guys that could resurrect the once-iconic brand. However, it hasn’t been the easiest site for me to find tricks on. The comparatively lower number of guys who have downloaded the app can create quite a distance between you and the “nearest” hotties, and my early experiences reminded me of being in a Gay.com chat room.

 

The Scene: The app is too young to have solidified its identity, and determining what guys are looking for is made more difficult by many, many guys not bothering to fill out their profile. Based on my experience, the app has earned a PG-13 rating, with flashes of flesh and sexual propositions, but many more selfies that would be safe to share with Aunt Roxy.

 

The Dudes: The youth presence is worth mentioning again, although most of the members are probably old enough to have had Gay.com 1.0 profiles. A strong diversity of guys in all of the categories that count, and what seemed like a noteworthy number of Asians compared to other apps (although I do live near Georgia Tech).

 

The Boner: The app offers extensive search options, allows guys to browse without their GPS location being revealed, and is new enough to have less clutter between you and the guy(s) of your wet dreams. Gay.com also allows members to “Like” each other’s pictures, which is a nice, casual middle ground of flirting between “Woof/Smile/Poke” and sending a message loaded with the awkwardness of “Hot pic, wanna fuck?”

 

The Buzz Kill: The “Wave.” I’ll let you take a poke at what it is. By far the Achilles heel of Gay.com is the money-grab the apps makes, not even allowing guys to see who viewed their profiles without ponying-up for a premium account.

What do you do once you’ve met him online? Grab your copy of the gay dating advice bible, Meet The Hottie In The Corner.

Gay Dating App #2: Grindr

If gay hookup apps were plotted as a scientific web graph, Grindr would be the nucleus from which all other apps sprout. In more colloquial terms, it’s the sperm that started the family tree.

It speaks to our quick-pace society that in four short years, Grindr has gone from a revolutionary taboo to being the granddaddy of mobile hook-up options. Remember how sleazy this app seemed when it introduced us to GPS-based booty calls, with a name that many adult gay men considered too naughty for their sensibilities? Now it’s as casual a gay meeting space as Starbucks or the bathroom stalls in a nightclub, and creating a Grindr profile has become as much a rite of passage as getting a driver’s license.

However, its popularity is its most fatal flaw. Just as it damages your psyche to see your Aunt Roxanne post semi-nude selfies on Facebook, it’s a major boner killer to be cruising for a hook-up and come across your neighbor or co-worker’s profile. I may know that my Human Resources manager plays for the same team, but our interactions are a bit more awkward once I know that he takes pictures from deceptively flattering angles, and describes himself as a “stone cold bitch who loves hard drinking, big [Read more…] about The Best Gay Dating & Hookup Apps.

Your Grindr notification goes off and you rub your pincers with glee while thinking a one-word thought: “Score!” But then you see that it’s from a guy who looks like the hindquarters of bad luck. Do you say, “Thanks, but no thanks”? Surely you would say that at a bar if a guy you didn’t like hit on you.

It would be wrong to say that the manners you use to lubricate your way out of real-world dilemmas should be used online. It’s not that simple. The guy in the bar isn’t an anonymous stranger. By the fact that he made himself known to you (“Hi, I’m Steve, and I think your jeans would look great wadded up on the floor by my bed”), he may be strange, but he’s no stranger. You just met. But online it’s different, and that’s why what’s considered rude behavior offline (not saying hello back to Steve, or ignoring the hand he offered in friendship) is entirely acceptable online.

Here’s a great example that a friend describes: A guy hit him up on Grindr with “Very Cute.” Now, Lo could have simply said “thanks” and moved on, but as he said, “I was weary of starting a conversation thread with someone I had no interest in dating, getting to know, or even chatting with. Instead, I trashed the message and thought nothing of it.”

But it didn’t end there. He got another message from the guy: “You must be shy cause I know it’s not cause I’m UNATTRACTIVE.” Irritated, Lo responded, “No shyness on my part.” And here’s how it devolved:

Hindquarters: “Then u must learn how to say ‘Thank You’ when someone pays you a compliment.”

Lo: “And you need to learn how to accept a polite rejection.”

Hindquarters: “First of all I was NOT seeking anything from your a** that warrants rejection!!!! I simply paid your DUMB a** a COMPLIMENT!! There is a DIFFERENCE!! LEARN IT!! Carry On!!”

 
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Was Lo wrong? Yes on both counts. He shouldn’t have answered Hindquarters at all, not even to say thank you. Online, any response simply prolongs the agony of the Hindquarters in all of us. Nobody pays you a compliment online without an agenda. To respond to somebody you’re not interested in is to signal that you are. If Lo had written a simple “thank you,” Hindquarters would have thought, “Houston, we have contact!” and proceeded to engage Lo further, an engagement Lo didn’t want.

So in a weird way, conventional kindness — like responding to somebody’s communication — is actually unkind and unproductive, unkind to Hindquarters because it fills him with false hope, and unproductive for you because it will start a text thread that you don’t have the time or the inclination for.

Civility isn’t dead. It’s just reserved for actual people. If somebody hits on you at a bar, you don’t have to worry about whether that guy is misrepresenting his physical self. You can hear the tone in his voice and see the shape of his body. He’s real whether you like him or not. And because he’s real, you owe him a little dignity and respect. But on Grindr you have no idea if the guy who just texted you is real. It could be a 14-year-old boy or a bored housewife looking for grins. Until you meet somebody for real, everyone online is an apparition. You don’t owe these half-lives anything but the kindness of silence.[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]