How To Deal With A Low Sex Drive Part 6
Now that you have a better understanding of your landscape, let’s see what rich ores lie beneath. It’s time to test-drive your dick and ass.
Set some time when you can be alone, away from any distractions including your partner. This is about you and you, not you and him. Prepare your self-pleasuring sessions with a little shopping expedition. Buy lubricants with different textures and smells. Consider using videos or reading sexually arousing stories to eroticize the context.
It bears repeating that if you can’t sense the physiological signs of your arousal, if you don’t figure out what you like and don’t like (and communicate it to your partner), sex will remain a chore instead of a choice.
But the more important reason to follow the recommendations you’re about to read is that masturbation primes the body’s sexual plumbing. Pleasuring yourself regularly creates a cycle of craving that amps up your libido and warms the path to partner sex.
Ready, Set, Explore.
Whether it’s a masturbation sleeve for your dick, a butt plug for your ass or a massager for your prostate it’s time to stroke, touch, caress and insert.
Get a sense of ownership and agency of your body. Experiment with different kinds of touch. Harder, softer, quicker, slower. Every man is different–there is no right way to do this, only your way.
Experiment with different speeds and pressure. Tighten and loosen your pelvic floor muscles while you’re doing all this. Try crossing your legs and exerting rhythmic pressure on your genital area. Rock your pelvis. Breathe deeply. Relax. You’re not a lab rat and this is not a science experiment. Listen to your body. What does it want? What does it respond to? How is it reacting?
Men may have the same parts but they don’t have the same number of nerve endings in those parts. That’s why what turns your friends on may turn you off. Nipple play, for example, can bring you to orgasm or bore you to tears. It all depends on the concentration of nerve endings in your nipples.
Don’t use vibrating toys until you’ve done these exercises a few times with just your hands. Vibrators are healthy ways to get stronger stimulation but skin to skin contact is the best way of gaining mastery, competence, confidence and comfort in what your body responds to. Once you feel at ease with your fingers doing the walking you can graduate to motorized stimulation.
Put Your Phone On Vibrate.
If Cleopatra could find something to pleasure himself so can you. A curator of New York’s Museum of Sex says there’s evidence the Egyptian queen kept a hard-shelled gourd filled with bees for use as a primitive vibrator. He literally took the sting out of masturbation.
Now, you don’t have to go to those lengths but it wouldn’t hurt to become a busy little bee and do some field research. So go to an adult toy store or shop online and buy a range of products made with different materials, speeds, and power. Vibrating toys made of plastic are popular because they’re terrific at transferring vibrations, but some men prefer vibrators made from silicone because of the higher quality material and varied textures.