General

As the author of the first body language book for gay men, I’m often asked how male body language affects guy-on-guy dating. The answer is plenty. But to understand why certain postures, gestures and expressions make you more appealing to gay guys, you have to understand the 5 major principles of gay body language:

#1. Words lie, bodies don’t.

The truth leaks out of our bodies like a pockmarked water pail. As soon as we put a finger in one hole another one opens up. You may think you look calm, cool and collected, but look down– your foot’s tapping the floor like a woodpecker. Sexual signals bounce all over the place whenever gay men get together, and they’re being sent with heads, eyes, arms, hands, legs, and feet. Yes, feet. Long story, keep reading.

#2. Your body language changes when you see somebody hot. And you’re usually not aware of it.

Hidden camera studies show that a man’s posture changes when he sees somebody that turns him on. He, or more to the point, YOU, will:

1. Pull your stomach. (To look sleeker)
2. Throw your shoulders back (to occupy more space)
3. Puff up your chest (to look bigger)
4. Lift your head (To look taller)
5. Protrude your jaw (to look more dominant)

It’s a form of preening. Researchers call it “Auto-erotic signaling.”

[Read more…] about The 5 Principles of Gay Body Language

The kicker? The Chairman of the Joints Chiefs of Staff approved the article before it went to publication.

And it won the 2009 Secretary of Defense National Security Essay competition.

The money shot:

More in the New York Times.

Congressional Republicans received key backing today for their health care plan, picking up support from the National Association of Undertakers.

The funeral directors’ group, which represents undertakers, embalmers and hearse drivers across the country, gave the GOP plan a big thumbs up, saying in a press release, “Finally, a health care plan that works for us.”

The endorsement from the undertakers’ association was the second major endorsement in two days for the GOP plan, which yesterday picked up support from the National Association of Viruses and Bacteria.

Elsewhere, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin’s memoir will be published Nov. 17, with an English version to follow.

This video parody of a man inadvertantly entering his date’s back door (really, wouldn’t she know?) is well worth the watch. Thanks goes out to my friend Rick Howington for flagging it. Rick hosts my sites on his servers. If yer tired of being gouged for hosting, give him a click.

My friend Rick Howington (he hosts my sites on his servers at

This is the video that I’m going to circulate when he bites the big bone. May as well do a sneak preview.

I just read in the newspaper that the Alabama Supreme Court has rejected a challenge to a state law prohibiting the sale of any obscene device for stimulation of the genitals. The Love Store in Hoover (near Montgomery) Alabama had challenged the law as unconstitutional. The Alabama Supreme Court rejected the challenge Friday in a 7-2 decision.

The court, primarily male, confirms my belief that men have a powerful fear that a woman might get addicted to her vibrator and not need him anymore.

[Read more…] about When Customs Finds Your Vibrator in Front of Your Boss.

Guy Drives Into Store to Steal Sex Toy – Watch more Funny Videos

I cracked an HIV joke.

Half the crowd laughed.

The other half glared.

Was I wrong?

Dear Former:
I really wished you’d have come up to me after the screening—I was giving away free samples of ANAL-EZE, the desensitizing cream for overly sensitive assholes like you.

Now, before I rip you a new one, let’s set the scene for the folks who weren’t there: I helped moderate the Q&A portion of the screening with drag diva Bubba D. Licious. There were, I don’t know, what 200 people there?

Anyway, I started out by asking the panel of HIV experts onstage if there was any room for humor when we talked about HIV and safe sex. The “joke” that so deeply offended your ass, ANAL-EZE, was actually a quote an HIV+ guy had written to my column. He had recently been infected with HIV and was struggling with a way to disclose the information to potential partners without freaking them out.

Here’s his joke:
[Read more…] about Can you make fun of HIV without insulting its victims?

These pictures prove that it’s okay to be a jerk as long as you’re a funny one.

For more office notes, click here (holytaco.com)