Crap. 29 days and 22 hours to go. Decided to stop drinking for 30 days because a) I could save a few thousand dollars and b) It’s a great way to feel superior to everyone else. Oh, and because my liver kept dialing 911 when I passed a phone. I told a close friend I was going dry in January. His words of comfort? “See you in February!”
If anybody has any advice on how to get through the month, I’m all ears.
Karl Rove, the architect of George W. Bush’s divisive politics, the man who argued for a Constitutional Amendment to ban gay marriage on grounds that it would threaten the institution, got divorced last week after 24 years of marriage.
Another champion of family values hoisted on his own petard.
Here’s what he said about gay marriage–you know the thing that threatens straight marriage more than straight divorce:
”ROVE: Well, marriage is a very important part of our culture and our society. If we want to have a hopeful and decent society, we ought to aim for the ideal. And the ideal is that marriage ought to be and should be a union of a man and a woman. And we cannot allow activist judges to overturn that. We cannot allow activist local elected officials to thumb their nose at 5,000 years of human history and determine that marriage is something else.’‘
Just once, I’d like to see a public figure do some private introspection. And make an apology. Here’s what I’d like to hear from you Karl, short and sweet:
“My divorce hurts the institution more than your marriage. If I can’t make it work, I have no business trying to prevent you from trying.”
It almost feels like a parody of an ad, but it’s not. There’s 3 in the campaign, one as funny–and shocking as the next:
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Mostly guys break up with me. Or never get crushes on me in the first place. But this crush—this one was mutual until it waned on my end first. I take this as a great victory, and I have a chemical-laden concoction to thank for it.
I met him at a club where he was performing. He took the stage, and there was just something about him. I was mesmerized. And his story—a funny tale about a suicide gone awry—made me think he’d get me. That he understood the pain of life–a prerequisite for me to take anyone seriously.
People buzzed around him at the end of the show so I left. Once home I found him on Facebook and messaged him that his story stuck with me and congratulated him on a tale well told.
He graciously emailed me back, and I found out he lives mere blocks from me…with his girlfriend. Subsequent emails mentioned her over and over. Still, he friended me. [Read more…] about Would you date a guy who drank Ensure?
Here’s the list of superstar couples who avoided celebrity divorce:
Today, I heard from a SECOND friend that his mom refused to have him over for Christmas Eve dinner because he wanted to bring his boyfriend. On grounds that it’s against the Bible. On Christmas. CHRISTMAS!
What is the calculation in a mother’s mind that says, “I’d rather be apart from my child on Christmas than to meet the man he’s sharing his life with?” What could be so powerful that it would neutralize the bond between mother and child? By what balance of scales do you choose an abstraction (“The Bible says homosexuality is wrong”) over flesh and blood (YOUR SON). Especially when he’s in his early 20’s.
It is a testament to the power of fear, hatred and ignorance that it can keep mother from child on the holy days. It’s like religion creates a kind of maternal amnesia–“Son? What son?” A close friend, who is deliriously happy in a committed relationship, wanted to bring his boyfriend home for the family’s traditional Christmas dinner. His boyfriend was not going home to his family so there was no way my friend was going to leave him alone on Christmas Eve.
Enter Mom. Or, rather, Exit Mom. He could come; but only alone. A condition she’d never impose on her other children. My friend stood his ground. He did not want to abandon his boyfriend on Chrismas Eve. So, instead, his mother abandoned him.
Why are parents so willing to pick the church over their child?
I love this story because it shows how love insists its way through the cracks of a family sidewalk. Most of us would be surprised if our brother showed up to our marriage, let alone be the best man.
From Towleroad:
“Eamon Farrell is having a blessing to mark his union with artist boyfriend Steve Mannion. According to the Irish Independent, the pair actually got married in Canada this summer, with Colin as Eamon’s best man. At the time Eamon lamented the fact he and his partner could not wed in Ireland…After the wedding blessing the couple will spend the evening with a host of well-wishers in Krystle nightclub, a funky venue on Harcourt Street in Dublin. The club has private booths, a pent house and a VIP suite – ideal for accommodating the VIP party. It will be a family night out, including Farrell’s mother Rita and sisters Claudine and Catherine, the Independent reports. A gang of other Irish celebs will be there too.”
The sunny-side-uppers claim that a positive attitude is the secret to success. If only all the Eeyores of the world would start thinking more positively, we could cure disease, create world peace, and line our pockets with riches.
Yet the self-proclaimed realists assert that they’re the only ones are willing to face the facts. Leave life to the Pollyannas, and they’ll skip us off the edge of a cliff, clutching a copy of The Secret to their chest, passionately chanting, “I believe I can fly, I believe I can fly.”
But which side is right?
The answer is both. Or neither, depending on whether you prefer your glass half-empty or half-full.
As any cynic will tell you, ill-informed optimism deludes people into ignoring reality. Yet doom and gloom pessimism sucks people into depression and inaction. Neither of these mindsets are helpful in bad situations.
The pessimism versus optimism debate is actually a false choice. It’s an either/or myth, perpetuated by people who are completely exasperated that the clueless optimists/pessimists on the other side won’t see the truth.
However, the real duality we need to embrace is facts AND faith. [Read more…] about Who’s Right–The Optimist or The Pessimist?
Dear Sexorcist:
I’ve come to realize I have a thing for dominant women, though I haven’t acted on it. I can’t help but think that women into BDSM or dominance have serious psychological problems and do I really want to go there? I mean, are these women to be avoided at all costs or do normal, sane dominant women exist?
— Skeptical in Suwannee
Dear Skeptical:
So the guys who want to be dominated are sane but the women who want to dominate are not? “Hello, Pot? This is Kettle. You’re black.”
I’d beat you with a cane if I didn’t think you’d get hard. But then again, I should be nicer to a guy who’s just coming out about his sexual desires. Your predicament is remarkably similar to closeted gay guys: horrified at your own feelings and attacking the people who share them. Then, drunk on the feeling of superiority (“I’m not like them”), you’re certain that “they” are morally wrong or psychologically impaired.
Christ, you’re not a submissive; you’re a Republican!
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