How Porn Stars Bottom Without Pain
A couple of years ago, researchers in England wanted to know how porn affected men’s sex lives. The goal was to compare users with a control group of non-users, but the study was scrapped.
They couldn’t find a single man who hadn’t seen porn!
“We started our research seeking men in their 20s who had never consumed pornography,” Professor Simon Louis Lajeunesse told a British newspaper. “We couldn’t find any.”
A few years ago a gay men’s health charity surveyed the gay population about where they got information on anal sex. A whopping 41% of gay men said porn.
Obviously, gay porn has a huge influence on how we approach intercourse. Some of the lessons it offers are good but some are atrocious. Like this one: You don’t have to prepare, train, or have a strategy to bottom for a guy who’s hung like the Florida panhandle. You just look at the camera, smile, and, in pizza terms, get pounded into dough and tossed up high.
So you try the same approach in real life, even with an average-sized guy, and you end up howling with so much pain the neighbors think you’re rehearsing a werewolf movie. Clearly, porn is great to look at but not learn from.
How Porn Stars Prepare For The Impaling
I commissioned a survey on some of the biggest luminaries in the business to find out how bottom scenes are filmed. Respondents included porn stars, producers, directors, and line staff—the lighting technicians, camera operators, and sound engineers responsible for half the orgasms in gay culture.
With signed disclosure forms promising anonymity, we got some eye-popping intel that will forever slant your view of porn. Let’s draw back the curtain on the industry and see how the sausage is made behind the scenes.
Preparing Before The Shoot
Porn performers don’t spread their legs for bread without a lot of preparation. The most obvious priority is getting the anal canal cleaned out because hey, gravy is only good on mashed potatoes.
It Starts With The Right Diet
Performers start eating a high-fiber, low carb diet about two or three days before filming. There are lots of fruits and vegetables, with plenty of juices and water (you’re getting ready to spend several hours under blazing hot spotlights, so it’s important to be hydrated).
Chicken and fish are preferred proteins because white meat is digested faster and more thoroughly than red meat. Some performers avoid pork to decrease the likelihood of “bacon bits” making a cameo appearance.
Plug That Hole!
Prior to a shoot, usually the evening before or morning of, many performers insert a dildo or butt plug to stretch their sphincters.
The morning of the shoot should start with a good bowel movement. Many performers have their superstitions for a thorough clean-out: for some it’s a cigarette (!), for others it’s a large coffee or smoothie.
Till The Waters Run Clear
After the morning dump, it’s time to start douching (although some men start this process the night before, especially if they’re prepping for a gang bang scene).
They douche early and often. They do not to stop at the first sight of clear liquid coming out of their bum. They do it until they can practically gargle with their butt spit. “I want my ass so clean viewers can see their reflection on it,” said one high-profile porn star.
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