How To Start A Conversation With A Cute Guy

When you approach somebody you don’t know it’s really important to start the conversation with something engaging. Unfortunately, most of us start a conversation with something boring like, “I am so and so, what’s your name?”

Boring.

The first thing you say to somebody you don’t know is referred to as an “Opener.” As in, a conversational opener. Here are a few we like.

Conversational Openers

Hey, quick survey–do you think you can tell if somebody’s gay by the length of their ring finger? Because scientists think so. Apparently, if the length of your ring finger is about even with your index finger, YOU’RE GAY. And if your ring finger is longer than your index finger, YOU’RE STRAIGHT. Look! (hold up your hand and show him).

I’ve gotta come up with three ways to tell if a masculine guy is gay, but get this–it can’t include whether he looks at other guys. So I’m thinking, #1 How comfortable is he with women? Cuz gay guys are a lot more comfortable around women than straight guys. #2 How does he hug other guys? Straight guys don’t touch belt buckles; gay guys do. But what’s #3?!!! Tell him that studies have shown a strong correlation between homosexuality and finger length. In gay men, the ring finger is about as long as the index finger. In straight men, the ring finger is noticeably longer than the index finger.] Anyway, the guy you’re talking to will most likely raise his hand and look. This is where you can have some fun. If his fingers are about even say something like, “Ha! They’re right!” If his ring finger is longer (like straight guys) say something like, “Boy, are you in the wrong bar.”

Which of these is the funniest drag queen name? Lois Carmen Denominator, Hedda Lettuce or Summer Clearance?

My friend’s having an affair with a married guy and doesn’t think it’s cheating because the guy’s married to a woman. Is he right?

Is it ethical for a straight guy to play gay to get women? I’ve got a friend who cruises gay bars for women! Do you think it’s wrong?

While we are on the subject of meeting new strangers, here are a few more tips:

Warm up.

Approach anxiety will rear its ugly head without a few warm-ups. Start the night by BEING TALKATIVE. Befriend the bartender, the waiter, the manager, the drag queens. Open people you’d like to be friends with. It takes about three approaches to fully warm up.

Don’t walk into the bar, see a beautiful guy and think you should be able to walk over and land him in one short conversation. That’s unrealistic. Be focused on talking to everyone and build momentum. WARM UP. You can turn up the heat later.

The Three Second Rule.

How can you make sure you approach Shagability before your anxiety exceeds your desire? By opening him within three seconds of seeing him. That way there’s no time to be nervous or insecure or to host an internal debate in which you psyche yourself out.

It’s not a Three Second Suggestion, by the way. It’s a RULE–with a few exceptions. Like, don’t open a hottie as he’s depositing a check in the ATM! Waiting longer means you’re working up the courage to say something him. Remember the last time somebody pulled that on you? You saw it coming, moved away or prayed for a friend to save you. Don’t be that guy.

Bartender, another round of confidence!

Alcohol is a great thigh-opener but a lousy confidence-builder. Getting the guy means keeping your wits, something alcohol won’t let you do. You’ll forget crucial principles or slur your way to rejection. So, don’t drink or stick to a beer or two. If you’re going to drink, don’t hold it in front of your chest like a security blanket. Hold it low to your hip.

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