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Like A Pornstar

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How We Rank Our Prostate Massagers

best prostate massagersHow We Rank Our Prostate Massagers

Meet our Moan-O- Meter

You know how Rotten Tomatoes has a Tomatometer score? We call ours the Moan-O- Meter score.  Although our products are completely different the process with which we arrive at our scores is not.

On the critics side, we both have teams that read critical reviews and turn them into a single understandable score.  Our methodology is pretty simple: We categorize each expert critic review in five ways–very negative, negative, neutral, positive, and very positive.

Once we have those categorizations, our statistician creates a model that heavily weights both the number of reviews and whether they fall into the positive or very positive categories. 

For instance, a prostate massager with 10 neutral reviews would actually be ranked higher than a prostate massager with one positive review. Why? Because the more reviews you have the more trustworthy the information is.

On the consumer side, Rotten Tomatoes relies on ratings  from people who saw the movie while we rely on reviews from people with verified purchases.  We get these reviews from independent, third-party product review companies that works hand-in-hand with Google Reviews to ensure they are actually coming from consumers who’ve made verified purchases.

Basically, we have to do this by hand. That means we have a team of researchers that go into every online sex toy retailer and sees if there are reviews four the candidate product. They write down the number of reviews and the average score of those reviews.

To rank the products equitably, we develop a model that  gives more weight to the number of reviews as well as the positivity of them. Once again, we have to guard against products being ranked high with only one or two reviews with a 5.0. by weighting the results so we can make sure that the products that rank the highest also have the most amount of reviews. 

Of course the other similarity we have with Rotten Tomatoes is the fact that we use our research to investigate the pros and cons of each product. That means painstakingly reading not just all the critical expert reviews but the dozens and sometimes hundreds of user or “civilian” reviews from people who have made verified purchases.

 This is a very time-consuming task because as you can imagine many reviews contradict each other. For every person who likes a product there seems to be others who don’t. 

How do you make sense out of this kind of contradictory data? Well, you read and read and read and dig and dig and dig until you get to a point where there is a consensus of the things that are right with a product and a consensus about things that might not be. 

We are also very careful about always mentioning flaws that keep popping up in different reviews. These flaws are sometimes universally noted even by the people who like the product but more often they are articulated by a minority of reviewers. 

Even though they may be a minority we always mention these negatives because we think it’s important that you know about them.

And that is how prostate massagers get scored in our Moan-O- Meter.  Be sure to check out the top three winners in massagers: The Best Prostate Massager For Men,  The Best Prostate Massager For Beginners,  and The Best Prostate Massager For Advanced Players.

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